Uh yeah...

So you know the sweet lolita pic I've been working on...?
YEAH.
Well, I probably won't be able to color it anytime soon.
No, the computer works just fine. My tablet and photoshop works just fine.
It's photoshop that's the problem.
I like photoshop. It's good for altering photos, cropping, inking, even toning. However, it sucks with coloring, in my opinion. I just can't blend with photoshop very well. The blend tool on there is kind of crap...

I'm going to use SAI. Don't get me wrong. My dad bought me photoshop, he paid for it and it wasn't cheap. I am STILL going to use photoshop, a lot, just not for coloring. SAI, I think, will be much better. It has a marker brush and a better blend tool. I've seen a lot of video's on YouTube use SAI and in my opinion, it works better if you have to blend. But...

I can't download anything on my mom's computer (which is what I'm using) SO... when I get my own laptop (my mom is buying me one soon) I am going to download SAI and photoshop on there and give it a try!

In other recent news, school is extremely tiring.

I love studio art: 2D  because it gives me the chance to draw something other than anime/manga.
I love love love Chinese! It's such a fun and interesting language. All of my classmates are nice, and unlike Spanish, we get up and play games and have parties. Just a few days ago, we celebrated the moon festival! And we're taking a field trip to a Chinese restaurant.
Intro to teaching is fun! It's a fluff class because i have 2 AP classes EVERYDAY.
All of my other classes (especially math and APUSH) can just go die in a hole...

In more other recent news, I found out something really interesting...

My school is going to Japan!

Yep! in intro to teaching class, Mrs. H stopped by in our classroom and we got onto the topic of our global citizenship motto and Mrs.H said she's chaperoning the trip! She also said the trip will be in 2012, after school, meaning during the summer time. It will probably cost a lot...but my mom knows how much I really love Japan's language and culture, and how I want to be a Japanese translator for some company. I'll post more info when I get more infro. I'm just so excited!! There's nobody else to share this with so I have to type here...

Update

I inked some more of my sweet lolita pic I'm working on! I think I'll finish the hair tonight, then tackle the dress tomorrow which is going to be the hardest part...

EDIT: PFFFT. I finished the line art!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Now on to coloring!!!!!!!!!!!

Ah... Summer is almost over

And I have school next Tuesday *troll face*
I have a lot to talk about today

I'm more motivated to exercise than ever before. Today, I was dancing in the bathroom to Kanpeki Gu no ne (watarirouka hashiritai) and I looked at myself and I thought. "oh my gosh. I'm so...fat" It just reminded me to keep going with my plan of losing weight, I started it shortly after I decided I wanted to do an exchange program in Japan. Today, I ate broccoli with my chicken, I'm starting to trash juice and drink water instead. I got yogurt as a snack today rather than chips, I walked to the store with my grandma, I'm learning kanpeki gu no ne and other high cardio dances. I'm drinking a strawberry banana smoothie rather than eating ice cream. These simple changes lead down to a road of healthy living and weight loss. Every time I want to stop and give up, I'll just look in the mirror.

I'm more motivated to learn Japanese than ever. I book marked books on amazon that people reviewed and said was good and helpful. I'm going to buy these books and study like crazy! I have 2 years to do it.


Why do I have 2 years?

Well, my mom rejected the idea of my exchange program, which completely sucks. The good news is that she said she'll take me there in 2013. When she said that I was like "lol WHAT? R U SERIOUS?!!" It turns out she was serious because when I asked her if I could order the books, she said: "Are you studying for when we go to Japan?" lol, so yeah, I'm going in 2 years, as a graduation present. I'm going to study hard. I'll post when I order the books and when they come in~

And, I'm back to finishing my picture! I stopped because it was boring me, but now I want to continue it. This is what I've done so far:

Ugh, Inking takes soooo long...

And recently, to help my Japanese, I got an ameba account!
Ameba is a super popular blogging website! But the most fun part is the pigg game. Pigg is where you can talk to people, travel, and do numerous activities with an avatar. it's like gaiaonline, but better in my opinion. Here's my blog link: HERE

Also, you can play pigg life where you grow flowers, fruits, vegetables,and trees. it's addicting! My farm:

And finally. Ameba pico is the English version of ameba. You can sign in with facebook (in fact, it's a facebook app) Ameba pico has less places than ameba, but on pico, buying stuff is better and a lot of people speak english. Both games are fun but I like my room and avatar in pico a lot better:

Exchange program?!

So, it's been a while since I updated.
Summer has been pretty boring for me. I eat, lay around the house all day, and stare into space, thinking. Sometimes I draw, read, go on the computer, or sing to my music too.
It's kind boring, and I'm not doing anything productive, but I need this time off! I need this break from school.

Today, I was bored and on YouTube wasting time. I ended up watching over 20 video's of people's experiences of being a foreign exchange student in Japan. I already said I wished to attend a "school" in Japan, but now I realize I want to attend a real school in Japan my senior year.

It won't be easy though.

One, money. I have no doubt it will cost a fortune.

Two, credits. I'll be spending a semester (6 months) in a foreign place, which means I'll be missing school. I really need to make sure I have most of my credits, even if I have to take them in the summer.

Three, language. I know hiragana, katakana, and a handful of vocabulary. I only know how to
write about 10 kanji, but I can recongnize around 30, which really isn't enough. I know that
as an exchange student, they won't be expecting me to be fluent, but I at least want to learn a bit more before I go over.

Four, weight. Me being foreign and having dark skin will already make me stand out, so when I go over, I want to be a lot skinnier than I am now. I've been meaning to lose weight forever, but it's not easy, trust me. But now because of my health, Lolita, and now going to Japan, I have 3 big reasons to want to lose weight.

I'm discussing this with my mom NOW, even though it won't happen until next year. I really want to plan this out in advance. I hope she says yes. If she does, I can learn about the culture, language, and customs first hand.

Right now, I am researching exchange programs, costs, and watching and reading blogs about people who are doing the same thing I'm attempting.

Rethinking

I was drawing last night, and I was listening to all of my AKB songs. Then I was up all of the night thinking.
Something bothered me about what I posted yesterday in my post (My conclusion about AKB)

It's been bothering me all day, so now I have to fix it.

I was listening to the B sides of Beginner "Boku dake no value" "Mint ni tsuite" "Nakeru Basho" I realized I really loved them (especially boku dake no value) I had never listened to them before, I never gave them a chance and I don't know why. This made me realize something.

Okay yes, there are many annoying things that AKB does that bothers me.

Like their songs. It's either a moderately uplifting song, or a slow ballad. ALL of their songs fit in this category. (except Beginner and RIVER) There's no variation! I wish they'd add funny noises in their music like H!P does to theirs. I wish they'd let lose and have fun.

But I can't change that, their just not type of group.

I'll still be a moderately casual fan though.
And I still think Momoiro clover is better and more creative.

But I realize I can never hate AKB.
I may like Momosu waaaay more them them, but we all have groups we love and groups we like right?

.

My conclusion about AKB

 I got into jpop through the H!P group, berryz koubou. Berryz led me to the rest of H!P including Morning Musume. They opened the doors to other groups in H!P, say, AKB for instance. I've always focused on berryz. After all, they were the group that led me into this wonderful world of music.
Then, I discovered AKB. But just like momosu, I was pretty casual about them. I loved their music, but I didn't want to learn their names and I didn't want to go around and discuss them on forums. I didn't feel like I loved AKB and momosu as much as berryz.

In early 2010, I started to really get into momusu. I learned their names, what they looked like, and what their voices sounded like. I started participating in the momusu forums, searching for older songs by them (Renai Revolution <3). I wished I was at anime expo (where they performed) I'd always watch the PV's and concert video's on youtube over and over. I cried when Koharu graduated (she was my favorite member) And bawled when Kamei Eri, and the panda's graduated. (I was just getting to know linlin and junjun!) I watched the kyuukies audition (I love you Zukki, Mogi) in suspense in who would be joining momusu. Cried when I saw maji desu ka ska! and how cute the girls looked. I rejoiced when maji desu ka ska and only you hit 1 million views.
 Suddenly the "oh, this group looks cool but berryz are better" went to "oh wow, I love these girls just as much as berryz" And it happened naturally. I didn't force myself to be interested in momusu, It came freely. Of course during this time, I got more into AKB too. When they had a new single, I'd always be sure to add it to my ipod. I'd glance once or twice at their PV's, but never watching the whole thing.

So I guess you could say, I've always been a momusu girl. No matter how hard I tried to get into AKB as much as momusu, It didn't work. There's just these little thing about AKB that annoy me. Soon, I started feeling bitter towards them. I guess them selling 1 million copies per single compared to momusu's 40k has something to do with it. But that's not all:

• AKB doesn't sing live that much. That shows the world that you can't sing. It takes great effort to sing and dance at the same time. I tried it, it's really hard. People come to your concerts to hear you. What's the point if your dancing along to some studio recording? Otherwise, they can just plug in their ipods and listen to the song.

• AKB's fan service is just too much for me. In a poll, it showed that girls and boys around age 20 were the biggest AKB fans. The male and female section were nearly equal, which means that AKB's fans have just as many female fans as male fans. Then why all the fan service? Every other week, I see a magazine filled with Mayuyu or Acchan or Tomochin wearing sexy lingerie in suggestive poses. Photobooks that are made so you can "pretend" your on a date with the member. And Heavy Rotation. WTF was that? TEENAGED girls in lingerie wearing cat ears and kissing each other?! Over in Japan, it may be "cute" but over in America, If a girl or girl group did that, they'd be highly looked down upon and shunned. That sexy stuff and Lingerie is for Women, adults like Katy Perry and Lady Gaga. Teenaged girls shouldn't be playing around in that stuff.

•  The senbatsu elections are pointless. It is the same people every time. Every. Freaking. Time.

• Their sales keep going up for every single, which is a good thing. However, their sales keep going up regardless of how good the song is. It's just like how twilight got popular. Everyone suddenly notices it, and it becomes waaayy popular, waayy overrated. People are buying AKB stuff just because it's AKB, and it's what's in now. It doesn't mean they necessary like it, but they just want to be normal and be up to date with what's "in".

• They are just "too in your face" Participating in photo shoots, commercials, dramas, baseball games! Tokyohive makes it their goal to post an AKB article every five seconds. I just want to yell "I'm tired of seeing you"

There's more, lots more, but this is all I can think of now.
It sounds like I hate AKB, but really, I don't.
I have all of their singles on my ipod (except chance no junban D: and everyday kachuusha) and a select few songs off of albums and stages that I like. I've finally some to a conclusion after weeks of contemplating.

I'm going to be a casual about AKB, a casual fan.

I'm not going to go on AKB forums and spend my time watching PV's and concerts.When they have a new single, I'll listen to it, see If I like it. If I do, great, I'll buy it. If not, then, well, ignore. I'm just not going to do the same things with AKB that I do with momusu and berryz.
And what's wrong with that?
AKB may be Japan's #1 girl group, but that doesn't mean I have to be a die hard fan and worship them like goddesses. I think a causal fan will be much better. That way, I don't have to be rude to anybody when I read AKB related news on tokyohive or youtube. This fan war, these fights, this AKB vs momusu thing has worn me out. I can't be a fan of  both.

I choose momusu.
I'm pretty sure it has always been momusu. 

Momoiro Clover should be in AKB's place. Momoclo should be selling millions. I listen to their songs and think "wow, I've never heard anything like this before" I watch their PV's and I'm totally entertained. They have cool outfits (not school uniforms like most groups, except Ikuze! Kaitou Shojo) They do things that AKB would never do. Like wear coconuts on their boobs, or dance crazily. They aren't afraid to dress up as power rangers and look stupid. Their wild, crazy, and are all about having fun.Everything they do is original. Their unique. And that's what I like.

I wish AKB all the luck in the world. They've already sold millions, breaking lots of records and making history. Soon, they'll break the record for momusu's Love Machine which sold around 1.6k. Everyday Kachuusha sold around 1.5k, so I'll know they'll break the record with their next single. Personally, songs like 10nen Sakura, Sakura no Hanabiratachi, Boku no Taiyou, all of their older songs has this aura, this spark to them, which made them lovely songs. After Sakura no Shiori, AKB just kind of lost that spark for me.

I am going to this school no matter what! +rant

Anime and manga definitely helped me like Japan and get me into it, but I do not love Japan only for anime and manga. I love the language, culture, and history (even though I don't know much about these!)
That's why, before I die, I'd really like to visit there!

Next year, I hear my school is doing another exchange program, this time, Arundel students have a chance to go over to Sagamihara (near Tokyo) and visit their school. I don't know if this is official, but if it is, I'd be so happy! I already talked it over with my mom. She's worried about me going over there. I reassured her at least 2 teachers would come with us, and we'd be in groups (most of the time). Plus, I know a junior who I talk to that said she wants to go to. My mom never said a definite "NO", but it wasn't a yes either... I hope she lets me go. I have high confidence that I can pass the test (well, at least I think there's a test...) This is my dream...

I also really want to attend this school: http://www.japanese-school-asahi.com/
Asahi Nihongo, a school in Fukuoa, Japan dedicated to teaching students all over the world Japanese language and culture. It seems like a really cool school!

• Instead of of sitting in boring classrooms all day long, they host parties, field trips, and activities ranging from Hanami to martial arts to manga drawing workshops. They let you learn Japanese, while learning the culture too. 
• The pay also seems affordable. It's all under $1000 (If you stay for 2 weeks or less)
• You can choose where to stay. I'd probably stay in a flat, dorm, or with a host family. With a host family, I know I'd be super awkward. I'd worry about embarrassing myself in front of them, or being rude on accident O____O
• There's testimonials,which reassures me.

I don't see any downsides to this school!
When can I go to this school? Next Summer In 2 years? 5 years? When I get out of college? Japan just had numerous earthquakes and a tsunami hit them... they are healing, so I don't know. I thought the Summer course could be a good idea, but that course is only like 5 days *____* That's waay too short!

Why do I even have an interest in Japan? If manga/anime (which got me into Japan in the first place) was started in India, would I love India like this? What about Australia? Britain? Naahh, probably not. I love India. The clothes, the culture, the race. (chocolate skin and dark hair. Indians look very pretty <3 I love Australian and British accents, or any accent for that matter)

Who knows?

RANT:
I don't talk about Japan around anyone, because really, who cares? I like Japan, but why do I need to talk about it 24/7? Though one time I did, around my friend N. I regret it. Here's what happened:

N: *scream*
Me:What?
N: WE'RE LEARNING ABOUT RUSSIA!!! (we're in world history class)
Me: *shrugs* okay
N: I LOVE RUSSIA!!!
Me: Okay... clam down. We're learning about Japan and you don't see me screaming.
N: But your not even Japanese...
Me: ...And? So what? Do you have a point? Your obsessed with Russia.
N: Well, I'm Russian, and I like other countries too.
Me: Okay, Yeah, me too. I really like India, the culture and customs.
N: What are you talking about?
Me: *face plam* Oh, never mind

That was like a slap to my face. I know I'm not Japanese. I am AFRICAN AMERICAN. And the last time I heard, I don't have to be Japanese to visit Japan and learn the culture. Oh. You think just because your Russian (I'm talking about N) You can love Russia, and because I'm not Japanese, I can't love Japan?

BS
I was bitter towards her the rest of class as much as I could without being obvious.
After that situation, I never say anything about Japan.
She used to be into anime/manga until she apparently thought it was "lame" or "uncool" and left. (which is tottaly fine) She still thinks I'm so anime/manga japan obsessed person. (despite me not going to anime club in forever) which is sad, but oh well. Even I'm drifting away from anime/manga. I still like it, but its not where In was a few years ago. me a few years ago:

"OMG!!! The next chapter of ________ came out!!! I HAVE TO READ IT!!"
"OMG!!!   I HATE sasuke, he's so annoying"
"OMG!!! Funimation FINALLY got new anime"
*logs onto computer at school**goes straight to mangafox*
now: *logs onto computer at school.**goes straight to jpop asia*
Yeah. Much more into jpop (that is my anime/manga substitute)
maybe if we turned our anime club into an "Asian pop culture" club, or  (because why does our club have to stick that that?) "pop culture" club, I'd actually show up.

I'm also getting sick of some of my friends who are 1/2 asian or 1/4 asian or 1/8 asian. They'll be like: "We can do this because we're Asian" "it's an Asian thing" "You can't do it because your not Asian*

I want to slap them all in the faces. endlessly.

It's not that I'm jealous (I'm not) It's just so annoying having to hear it all of the time. it's not as If your even full Asian. Your half or a fourth or an eighth. Maye I could make an acception If you were full, but your not. You connect these statements with these stereotypes. You say you hate stereotypes, and that their wrong, yet you use them all of the time. random generated conversation:

J: "My parents grounded me because I got a B in Spanish"
K: "Ha ha, J, you parents are so Asian"

WTF? 
EVERY race wants their child to do good. Lots of non Asian parents (depending on the parents) will get mad If a B (and not an A) is mad in the class. My mom will get mad at me If I get a B in a class she knows I can get an A in, like gym or facts or something.

It's as simple as that.

My friend N, used to do it a lot too, but now she doesn't.
And I love her for that <3

Every time someone does it, I just kind of mentally roll my eyes. (I don't want to be rude)
It's not just me, I see the annoyed looks on some other people's faces too.

we're all just too nice to say anything.